The next few days...

My mom has been more or less stable at this point. She's developed edema throughout her body because of lack of nutrition/low albumin levels. My brother and I try reducing the swelling by lightly massaging and moving her skin towards the lymph nodes in her body. It usually works. But as always, it eventually builds up again.

The oncologist said that unless she spikes a fever, she might get released within the next few days. The doctor said that this might be the best she'll feel and we should take advantage of this opportunity. Coming on the fifth week of staying almost every night in the hospital room, we almost were in disbelief. At the same time, we know that we need to take everything day by day and things can change at any moment. Also, we need to be as prepared as possible for her care at home.

Healthy Jello Option.

Eating is a huge challenge. The mass in the stomach prevents her from eating much and food will cause pain. At the same time, without food, she gets puffy and very fatigued. We're trying to get whatever we can through...mostly liquids and jello. Sometimes oatmeal or cereal with soy milk. It gets difficult and my brother and I take turns encouraging her, playing bad cop/ good cop.

Sometimes I feel bad pushing her. But it is her goal to make it to the wedding, and we want to do everything possible to give the greatest chance of that happening.

Speaking of jello, I just tried this brand: Jeannie Prebiotics Gelatin-free Dessert. It's high in fiber and Vitamin C. We just tried peach, and I can say, it's Mama Lee approved. I figured if she was eating jello in the hospital, might as well make this and get some vitamin C in her.

Please let mom feel well enough to listen to me!

It's been really helpful having my brother here. We are way pass the "cabin fever" phase. It's more like, we've accepted the hospital is our new home. I freely walk around in this robe my mom made many years back, out of a blanket.

Tonight, my brother went back into Manhattan to take care of some errands including wedding stuff. This means that tonight and tomorrow night, I won't have anyone helping me. Well, aside from the nurses. It's a bit scary. For me and my mom. No question, my brother is strong and my mom trusts his strength. Me...not so much. And getting up 3 to 4 to 5 times in the middle of the night is very exhausting.

Push the bed up. Lean Mom's legs towards the floor. Edge closer off the bed. Rest. Hold tight and lift her up. Slowly turn in the direction of the commode. Have her sit. Get bathroom paper ready. Wait. Wait more. When she's done, lift her up. Pull up underwear. Turn body towards bed. Sit. Rest. Lift legs and shift her body. Use pad to move body in desired position. Place pillows to position her. Rinse bucket. And Repeat.

I am also charged with taking her for a walk tomorrow and feeding her. Lots of pressure. Both very daunting tasks. Hoping Mom is feeling well enough and can eat more.