For a while, it's been hard to put into words, but I think I know now. When my mom made a turn for the worst, it was like a dagger entered my heart, and as she declined, the dagger twisted and jerked it's way through.
Deep sadness, grief, and despair poured through my veins. Day after day, we mustered as much self-control as we could to stay strong and brave.
Then, in a single instant, she was gone. I was mentally and physically drained. I don't have anything left.
(My feeling when people say I'm handling this so well)
Couldn't have said this any better. I get that same line from people too..."you're handling everything so well". At times, I don't know what to think about that. I know they mean well and all but this whole experience completely drains you to the brink of craziness. You are so spent each and every day and those are the not so bad days. The really bad days, you are just a shambles and clinging onto anything.
ReplyDeleteTake heart and be strengthened.Newton Kenyatta University School of medicine
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